Tuesday, April 28, 2020

Exciting Events with GSTC



THE CLUB EMAIL

Stay safe.  Social distance.  Crush those miles.



Hello team. 
We are super excited to offer these fantastic experiences for all GSTC members.  Zoom meeting information will be published in our Facebook group page, or you can email us for the link.




Olivia Baker is one of America's best 800m runners, and she is proud to be your teammate!  In high school, she was nothing short of a NJ legend at Columbia HS.  She is the only one in state history to win four (FOUR!) gold medals at one NJ Meet of Champions.  A month later, she won the national 400m HS title.  She went to Stanford and was an 11x All-American, and has now been a top-four finished at the USA Championships three times!  But she's not just a runner.  After taking the MCATs, she planned on attending medical school next year, but with the Olympics pushed back...she has postponed her medical pursuits, as well.  She also likes to ride a unicycle!


Kate Grace won the 800m at the 2016 Olympic Trials, and months later she finished 8th in the Olympic final!!!!  She grew up in Los Angeles, attended Yale with GSTC Hall of Famer Jeff Perrella, and is on the 4x1500 American record relay team.  She owns incredible PRs of 1:58 and 4:03.  She started with NJ*NY*TC (and ran some workouts with GSTC!), but has since moved out to the West Coast.  She's now a Nike runner trained by legendary coach Jerry Schumacher in Portland, Oregon.






Molly Seidel shocked the world in January by finished second at the Olympic Trials in her first-ever marathon.  However, she has been a world class runner for years, as she competed for USA in the Great Edinburgh Cross Country Championships in 2012, 2013, and 2018.  She grew up in Wisconsin, competed for Notre Dame (teammates with our friend Tim Ball!), and has won NCAA titles in XC (2015), indoor track (3k and 5k!), and outdoor track (10k).  She now trains in Boston and competes for Saucony.




Happening this Friday!  Please email Laura for details at buggy811@gmail.com




GSTC Virtual Race Series


Between May 1 and June 15th, we will be hosting a spring season virtual race series of 1 mile, 5k, and 10k.  

You can do one, two, or all of them....for free....and we're giving out prizes!  We just need to figure that out...most likely will be GSTC gear.


Support Our 
Club's Sponsors

Jarrett Dewelde is a Financial Advisor based in Somerville. His firm, R.I.C.H. Planning Group, was established in 2001, is completely independent, and also has offices in Woodbridge and Morristown. Areas of specialty include financial planning, investments, IRAs, college planning, and life insurance. If you have a question in one of these areas, be sure and give him a call. Jarrett has been a member of the Garden State Track Club since 2017.


(Editor's Note: If it wasn't for a financial planner a decade ago, I would never have been able to buy my first house.  No one wants to financially plan for the future, but it's such a good move.  Find Jarrett on FB and ask him anything!  -Chuck)

Heather McDermott:
Official GSTC realtor

Heather McDermott, seen here breaking 19:00 in a track meet last week, has been helping GSTC'ers buy and sell homes for years.  She's also the masters women's captain and amazing!

If you are thinking of buying or selling a home or know someone who is, get in touch with GSTC's official Real Estate Agent, Heather McDermott! She loves helping her teammates with their real estate needs and will donate $250 to the team every time she sells a house to someone on the team or referred to her by someone on the team. 
phone: 860-978-4069


Wednesday, April 1, 2020

Our Response to COVID-19



THE CLUB EMAIL

We've been monitoring the COVID-19 situation closely.  After much discussion, here is our response.

All Seventeen Championships to be Held in December

State officials have declared that all seventeen team championships will be held in December.  "The show must go on," a representative shared, only under agreement of anonymity.  "Since we believe runners enjoy the 27k race just as much as the 5k race, we needed to find a way to accommodate everyone.  So we figured, you folks have nothing better to do than run our races every third day of December.  It should be great.  The three of us here decided that would be best.  Trust us on this one," he added.



Frieder Bros Release New Line of Elite Running Gear Called Twin Peaks
Minimum 85% PLP Age-Graded Runners Will Be Allowed to Buy It
The Frieder Brothers (TM) have released a new line of elite training gear on April 1 called "Twin Peaks."  However, this is a very unique line of gear.

"This brand is only for elites.  We don't want any hobby joggers wearing TP.  If you are running 18 minutes for a 5k, go buy some Nike crap off their website," one said during a news conference yesterday.

Instead of putting in a coupon code, potential customers must first go through a rigorous, five-step verification process that takes up to 5-7 business days to complete.  Some questions include name, PRs, links to these races, Strava followers, and average number of Strava kudos per run.  "Once we decide you're good enough for our brand, we'll allow you the opportunity to buy our gear.  But let's face it.  If you're out there running 8 minute pace and not giving me a kudos on the run I crushed this morning, you probably aren't a good fit for this company."

 

Club Member with Torn Hammy, Two Bad Hips, Swine Flu, COVID-19, Turf Toe, Broken Razor, and COVID-20 Logs 63.2 Miles Last Week
Brian Weitz, on the verge of turning 40 and joining the masters team, has overcome much adversity this winter and has hit sixty miles last week.  "I'm excited to join the masters team.  I'm looking forward to this new phase of my running career.  And at the rate I'm going, I'll be ready to do workouts sometime in February of next year.  Hmmm, maybe March."

Twin Peaks has already published a communication stating, although they're excited about him joining the masters team, he has not qualified to purchase any of their elite apparel.  


Garcia Pens Great American Novel
Utilizing his free time thanks to the remote learning plans instituted for all New Jersey schools, GSTC half miler and physical education teacher Ricky Garcia has written a book.

"After three weeks of not teaching kickball, I've found myself reflecting about how tragic and futile the human existence truly can be.  But don't get me wrong.  I'm not embracing any sort of existential nihilism stance on humanity.  My work, moreover, explores a more nuanced and refined concept of actions, suffering, and feelings.  Macabrely apathetic, if you will, is probably the right definition of the central theme," he said while checking his Instagram feed.   

He is currently looking into his publishing options.      

Without Donuts to Race For, Club Member Retires From Running

Mark Parisen announced his retirement from the sport of running today.  Citing a lack of motivation, an imminent fingernail replacement surgery, and canceled donut races in 2020, he decided to hang up his racing shoes after a long career with GSTC.

"I've enjoyed every minute with the club," he said in a phone interview.  "But, sadly, I think I did my last run with members of the women's team last week.  I'm just done."  

When asked for a comment, club officials were unsure who this man was.  "Is that the guy who used to race for us in like 2013?  Otherwise, doesn't ring a bell, sorry.  But hey, while I have you, can I interest you in running seventeen races in December?"


Club Gala Postponed
The GSTC postponed the club Gala weeks ago.  Rescheduling options include the fall, Yankee Stadium, or a two-hundred person Zoom conference.  "We've been having a Virtual Gala on Instagram, which has been great," club official Jason Timochko stated.  "It helps pass the time--a nice way for me to spend 3-7 seconds every day.  I read it, like it, then go back to sleep on the couch," he added.

 With No More Racing and Racing Selfies, Karl and Aya Begin Taking Selfies in Kitchen

Karl and Aya Leitz, the club's most famous, photogenic couple, have begun taking uniformed selfies in the kitchen without any upcoming races in sight.  


GSTC Museum Preparing for Summer Visitor Surge 
 
The GSTC Museum is almost ready to be unveiled, a secret source within the Leadership Team noted days ago.   She also noted the club president is "very bored" right now and should "certainly not quit his day job." 

Jaris Flattens the Curve Using Biceps & Posse from Paterson
 
The curve has become flattened in New Jersey this week thanks to Jaris and his homies from Paterson setting COVID-19 straight.

"I had a quick lil' call with the Corona last week.  Told him he needs to find a new turf to do his business.  We cool now, but it got a little hot at first," he said between flexes.  "You're welcome."

After Further Thought, Twin Peaks Closes to the Public
 
After reflecting about their business model, Twin Peaks has now closed for public consumption.  "After thinking long and hard, we have decided, as a company, to end our Twin Peaks apparel line.  The reality was, simply, no one was good enough to use it.  Our company standards are high, and no one met them.  So, screw you all," a company representative stated in an email from earlier today.  "But, we do encourage you all to give the twins the Strava kudos they deserve on a daily basis." 


Club Man Walks Fifty Miles to Raise Awareness to Coronavirus
 
Recognizing the urgency of the Coronavirus, this club member decided to begin a fundraiser to raise awareness for the cause.  "At the end of the day, I'm walking from Newark to Trenton for you, the people.  This is for all of humanity."  He noted the importance of raising awareness to a virus that more people need to be talking about.  "People are so busy doing pushups on social media--we need to really focus on the cause of our boredom, and that's why I'll be walking fifty miles down the Turnpike this week."

*************************

April Fools
Okay, but seriously...this thing is real

Joking aside, the spread of COVID-19 is very, very real, and we urge our members to be responsible citizens over the next several weeks and months.  

As you know, several club members are experts in the medical field.  Their experiences reflect many of the media reports.  Hospital beds are filling up, basic equipment like protective masks are in short supply, and the sheer percentage of hospital patients with COVID-19 is surging every week.  

Although older people are at greater risk of COVID-19 compromising their respiratory systems, anyone can become infected and require a ventilator for assisted breathing.  

Your best bet: assume you are infected but are asymptomatic (showing no symptoms).  Keep a good distance from others, limit your travels, wash your hands often, and listen carefully to the advice of medical experts.

This is not a hoax, it is not a political stunt, and it's not a conspiracy theory.  It is very real, so please be responsible citizens over the next block of time.  It will end eventually.

Support Our 
Club's Sponsors

Jarrett Dewelde is a Financial Advisor based in Somerville. His firm, R.I.C.H. Planning Group, was established in 2001, is completely independent, and also has offices in Woodbridge and Morristown. Areas of specialty include financial planning, investments, IRAs, college planning, and life insurance. If you have a question in one of these areas, be sure and give him a call. Jarrett has been a member of the Garden State Track Club since 2017.


(Editor's Note: If it wasn't for a financial planner a decade ago, I would never have been able to buy my first house.  No one wants to financially plan for the future, but it's such a good move.  Find Jarrett on FB and ask him anything!  -Chuck)

Heather McDermott:
Official GSTC realtor

Heather McDermott, seen here breaking 19:00 in a track meet last week, has been helping GSTC'ers buy and sell homes for years.  She's also the masters women's captain and amazing!

If you are thinking of buying or selling a home or know someone who is, get in touch with GSTC's official Real Estate Agent, Heather McDermott! She loves helping her teammates with their real estate needs and will donate $250 to the team every time she sells a house to someone on the team or referred to her by someone on the team. 
phone: 860-978-4069